A day at the lake

Today the girls and I went to Gunlock Reservoir for a bit of a swim and a nice suntan!
The girls (Cierra, Noelle, and Alexsis) and I spend a lot of time together!
They are my confidants, my advisers, my fashion experts, my smile crew, they are my best friends. They are the ones that I can count on when the day is rough and I just need a smile and a laugh.
Anyway I love these girls and I had a great day with them, even when it started pouring rain on our way home. Its just been one of those moments that I am grateful to be here today with these girls, share one of the last summers together and living our lives out for each other.

“When it hurts to look back, and you're scared to look ahead, you can look beside you and your best friend will be there”

A NEW perspective

Today I received a new perspective about life.

I know that just yesterday I was complaining about all the stuff that is going wrong in my life, or about things that were bothering me, but I have so so much to be thankful for!
In the past three years my entire life has changed and it is all because I let myself believe in something that was so powerful that I couldn't deny it!
I found my Heavenly Father.
Today I spent some quality time on the temple grounds in St. George, and it was the most peaceful place I have ever been to. The moment I stepped into the gated area of the temple grounds I felt at home. I felt loved. I knew that my Heavenly Father was looking down on me and explaining to me that this is where I belong, and that He has given me so much in the past three years.
I realized that I have so much to be thankful for.

• I have a family that loves me and supports me in everything that I do.

• I have friends that love to spend time with me and trust me.

• I have opportunities that most people will never see in their entire life!

• I have mentors that respect and support me with my decisions.

• I have a brother that has decided to change his life, and that is all I have ever wanted.

• I have a mother that is finally happy with herself!

• I have a father that loves me and would do anything for me to be happy, like moving across the state so that he can be there for my senior year.
  

• I have wonderful qualities about myself that make my life easier to live.

This list could go on for hours. Not that I am self absorbed or anything. I just realized that I have a lot more to be thankful for than to fret about. Not only did my Heavenly Father help me see that, but so did my friends and family. Thank you all for the love and kindness you give me every day. From now on I will be looking forward. From now on I will only look up upon the horizon of my future. Because I am worth the wait and because my happiness is not worth the stress.

One Rainy Night

So last night I was hanging out with my best friend Cierra and it started pouring rain. I mean like golf ball size rain drops. She gets this amazing idea to go and dance in the rain. So I agree, and it was a blast! We ran to our best friend Noelle's house and played with her and a bunch of our other friends. When the night was over I took the walk around the block to my house in the pouring rain and just thought about how the rain refreshes us. It can take an ordinary day and make it into a beautiful night. It can make any mistake in our land wash away and appear as if it never happened.
So cant the same be said about our lives. Cant rain just wash away all the bad and make our world seem just a little cleaner? Well while I was thinking about all of this I began to write a poem in my head. So here it is. I hope you like it.


it starts out slow
almost nothing
a drop in the sky
a black cloud of gloom
then the wind starts to twirl
and my heart starts to beat
a drop on my skin
and then it all begins

i comb through my hair
feel the coldness of the breeze
smell the wet in the air
and hear the wind in the trees
if this rain can heal the earth
why cant it heal our hurt

please kiss me in the rain
when the sun comes out
the hurt will come back again
please touch my wet skin
and erase this pain within
when the brightness shins
I feel your not mine
the hot dry air
shows me you dont really care

So please kiss me in the rain
to take away all my pain.

Oh how time flies

I went a whole year without posting something!
Now my senior year is over and what an incredible time it was.
I am now participating in the summer show, Move over Mrs. Markham, at dixie state college.
It really is an amazing experience, and I have learned so much from it!
But my life right now is not working so well.
Some say I have so much to be thankful for, and while that is true, I still wish I had more.
Here is a list of all the things that are on my mind right now, things that I just need to get out.

1. I am trying every day to find a job, and sometimes it just makes me so sad that I just never want to get out of bed!
2. I am trying to figure out college and what I should major in, and that in itself is just a mess. I want so badly to major in theater, but I have a feeling that those around me would rather me go into something more conventional, like psychology or something.
3. I see all my friends with serious boyfriends, or even just someone that is interested in him. I cannot believe that I am still single. I have so much to offer someone. I may not be skinny, and I may not be that beautiful, but I believe that I am worth it. So why cant anyone else see that?
4. I lost a bit of friends this year. Not that it was their fault. It was really all me. I became someone that involves themselves a lot in things that I used to never care about, fashion, drama, I dont know just things that made it hard to keep friends. Not to mention that senior year is the worst year. Its all about saying goodbye to the people, because in all honesty I probably will not see 40% of them ever again.
5. I wish I could get that one person out of my head, he has been there for over 3 years now and I feel like he will never leave. I always tell people to move on, so why can I not take my own advice?
6. I need to move out, I am ready to move on with my own life, but every time I find someone that may be able to go in with me for an apartment, they change their mind. I am so disappointed, I just need out of here so bad. Its not that I dont love my aunt and uncle, and I am so thankful for everything they have given me, but sometimes I feel like I am still fifteen!

My life is pretty great I must say, I have a future, a family, great friends, opportunities that tons of people will never have, and I had the most amazing senior year, but somehow I still feel like things are missing. Time really does fly when things are going so well. so maybe I should stop complaining and just look at the bright side of things.

Back to School Night

Back to school night was Thursday, and let me tell you it was one of the busiest days of my life, I arrived at school at about 3 in the afternoon, started decorate, getting everything in order, and talk to student council about the skit, and other such thing for the upcoming night. The

first orientation started at 5:30 for Freshman and Sophomores. It was incredible to see all the new faces, and even some of the old. I was so happy to see some of the old freshman returning and enjoying the school as much as we did. After Mr. Fowler spoke to the audience, Student Council put on our all famous, Dress Code Skit, It was a mixture of television shows and dress code violations to teach the kids about whats good and what should never be worn. It was super fun, Me and Victoria were "What not to Wear" host and I really got a kick out of acting. After the assembly was over, We gave tours to new students and sold all of our cool new Tuacahn apparel and merchandise. Then just as fast as the first assembly got over, the second one for Juniors and Seniors came, where we had to perform our skit once more, and yet again give more tours once it was over. And although it was a busy night, I saw so many old faces that I had been missing so much. After it all was over and the clock hit ten I went home to crash on my bed and remember how much I really love School. I loved back to school night with everyone and I cant wait for class to start!

Senior To-Do list.

Last night, at our last sleepover of the summer, me and my friends all made a to-do list of things we wanted to accomplish during this year, for Noelle it was a sophomore to-do list, but for the rest of us it was our senior check off. I was so happy to be writing down all the things I wanted to accomplish this year, all the things that I thought needed to be said. I wrote down things like, talk to a crush, and take a road trip; just silly things that I hope to check off throughout the year. I vowed to keep that list with me at all times, and when school starts I will try to accomplish a new thing every month. Hopefully by the end of the year they are all done, if not, OH well. I felt that this was an awesome goal setting ritual and I hope that some take my advice and make one for themselves. See how many you can check off, and make it fun and unforgettable.

Goodbye Summer

Wow its been so long since I wrote an entry. But I have been so busy with school, and basically enjoying my summer. I have been having so much fun with my friends that I didn't notice how fast the time flew by. School starts in less than a week, and I keep trying to spend as much time doing everything that I can with friends. I have had an incredible summer though. I think this is one of those summer that you look back and and talk about forever. From traveling with my dad to spending every morning for two weeks with my friends. What could a girl ask for? There was some drama, and a lot of long nights, but it was all worth it. I am going to miss the summer mornings with my girls. But I cant tell you how much I am excited for school.

I never thought I would love school so much until I went on the Student Council Retreat. All of us got together in a cabin out at Pine Valley and just, had fun, enjoyed every minute of our time together. We came up with some amazing goals, and a really great school theme. I am so excited to fulfill all the awesome things on our list! It will be a year that everyone talks about for a lifetime.